I know, I know, Suzi – I told you she was letting me take her picture. Which she did. Sort of. It was the most I could talk her into; sorry.
But isn’t that a freaky-deaky whatever-it-is? *I* know what it is – La-la-la! Ahem. I know, now, anyway, but it took forever to get it out of Ruby. She was right stoned on coffee last night, I swear.
She found it day before yesterday. Er… Saturday. No, no; it was Friday… oh, let’s let her tell it.
I hardly slept a wink the other night. What night was that…? I don’t remember, now – that just drives me crazy.
Me: What the heck is this freaky-deaky thing?!
That’s exactly what *I* said! Isn’t that the cat’s whiskers? Guess what that is! You know where I found that?
Well! I went out to get the paper on Friday- that’s the night I couldn’t sleep!
Me: Friday night?
No. Thursday night, which was why I was so late gettin’ the paper in on Friday. The paper boy always leaves it in the breezeway there, on the table, you know. And when I went out there, this thing was sittin’ on top of the paper…
And I thought, What the heck IS this thing?! And then I saw it was the sports pages out of the Toronto Star it was sittin’ on top of!
(laughs and claps her hands together)
Me: I’m sorry; I don’t follow…
Well, Satch had been here to mow the lawn! And I was so tuckered from the night before, that I was sound asleep and I didn’t even hear the lawn mower, can you believe that?
Me: You mean, your nephew, Satch?
Yes! (laughing) Well, he always brings me the sports pages from the Toronto Star! So, he’s the one that left this thing, wasn’t he? It was on top of the sports pages, and the sports pages were on top of the regular paper that the paper boy brought!
Me: Aaaah! So… what is it?
That’s what I asked Satch, didn’t I?
Me: So, you did see him, then?
No, I didn’t see him! I told you; I slept right through the lawn mower! So I called him on the phone, and I said, “What the heck is this thing?!” (laughing)
Me: Well, what the heck IS it?!
(more laughing and hand clapping)
… and that’s what she wants you to do.
Random Song for the Day: “Unplayed Piano” – Damien Rice & Lisa Hannigan